#176 4 DPI (02/20/13)

We are finally in the first Two Week Wait.  The IUI went well.  The IUI nurse complimented me on my cervix.  It is a good shape and position for baby heads/delivery.  That is good news.  The odd part was; they didn’t have me lay still for any period of time.  While I asked a few questions and what not, I stayed on the exam table, and didn’t rush getting up afterwards.  

Our sperm numbers were pretty good I think.  Post thaw this is how the numbers went; total sperm 76.4 Million/ml.  Our vial was .5ml and they used .1ml for testing.  Of those sperm 42% Highly active, 2% Slow but active and 56% Immobile.  The amount of active sperm I got was 13.4 million.  The clinic said that was fairly good.  So we are hopeful.  Once we got home we did some research on how long it takes the sperm to reach the end of the fallopian tubes.  Surprisingly the little guys make the journey in as little as 10-30 minutes.  With the IUI, closer to the 10 minute mark. 

The day of the IUI, every little twinge had me wondering if that was the sperm meeting the egg, or if that was my official ovulation, or if it was just general stomach issue, or plain psychosomatic and my head just playing tricks on me.   Since then, I’ve had a couple things where, Is this a sign, but in reality, I know it is way too early to have signs of anything, so I’m blaming the HCG shot for them.  Some symptoms include dizzy (which I get periodically for no reason anyways), upset stomach (usually caused by the prenatal vitamins, which I think is the full reason of morning sickness anyways, lol), sensitive sniffer, (this is a new one, as most smells I don’t register unless directly in my nose or very overpowering.  The downside to this is, I get the odorous diapers as my wife is very sensitive.) 

It seems things are getting calmer, and imaginary symptoms are getting less (dizzy spells still happening a bit though, and had an odd urge for hot sauce on dinner last night).  But everything could be coincidence, and just hoping everything is happing as planned.  We still can’t help but wonder if the sperm met the egg, and the egg wasn’t a prude and let the sperm in.  My uterus feels welcoming though.  

I have a few pictures from the day I will post when I sync my camera.  

#175 Follicles Update (02/13/13)

The results are in.  My egg has grown to 1.8.  Not quite enough for the HCG shot tonight, but tomorrow night at midnight, my darling lovely Sherpa (Deb) will be giving me the shot.  It will be a lovely Valentine’s day thing to do, the start of our official attempt of trying to make a baby.  That’s a lot of maybe, and it is hard not to get to over excited, but we both realize that this is just that, an attempt.  No guarantees.  It is still nice to feel like a puddle of goo because we are so smooshy about finally getting to this point. 

This also means, after about one year of getting everything ready to try, we have finally scheduled our first IUI for Saturday afternoon.  It is great that it is Saturday because then I don’t have to go to work after the fact.  We can make it a lovely day, maybe go to the zoo, and just have a relaxing day for us.  This does mean our trip to the states will be postponed.  We could go on Sunday/Monday instead, if the packages we are shipping to the boarder have arrived, or just next weekend.  

#173 Follicles (02/11/13)

This morning was my first follicle measure for this month.  They are still small, but that is to be expected on day 10, as I usually ovulate around day 15 or 16.  The one to keep an eye on is 1.5 cm and on the right side, it needs to be about 2 before they will do the hCG shot.  That is just one good size egg, which takes some stress of twins off the plate, the rest of my eggs were under 1.  The additional plus is that it is on the right side, which is the opposite side of my rubber nub (polyp) in my fallopian tube on the left side.  All is well with my eggs thus far. 

Deb came with me, but they wouldn’t let her in for the ultrasound, and the follow up appointment was just to say my eggs were too small, and give me the measurement of the eggs and say keep my ultrasound appointment for Wednesday.  It was nice to have Deb there to wait with for the appointments though.  She is coming to the next one as well, because that is when they will be giving instructions on giving the hCG shot and she sort of needs to be there for that as there is no hope on this green earth that I will be able to give myself a shot.    Deb has this vision of her running from the other end of the room with the warrior holler as she runs towards me, then stops right before injection and says “I can’t do it.”  I have faith in her she will be able to do it. 

Acupuncture has been going well, and I love chiro.  I had a double appointment on Saturday.  Chiro helps keep my stomach/digestion in check, as well as my hips.  I don’t know how I did before chiro, it is great.  The meditation during acupuncture is great, and I’m getting good vibes that it helps from the fertility clinic.  I don’t think they can officially say people should do it, but they have responded positively that I am doing it and have been for a few months.  The day of the IUI I will be going in for a pre and post acupuncture appointment; which if my IUI is on Saturday might delay the road trip to the states, but all for a good reason.  I do miss the massages, but I’m saving my coverage money for when I’m pregnant and need them for my back or feet or to pamper my pregnant belly/body.

On a side note, my crohn’s ultrasound went well.  I didn’t even need the contrast ultrasound because nothing is flared right now.  With nothing being flared there is nothing to contrast, so no IV and a fairly quick, normal belly ultrasound.  

#169 hCG? (01/23/13)

Well, yesterday I went for more blood work.  From Friday to Tuesday my levels went from LH 10 > 4 and Progesterone 5.6 < 30.  So timing something didn’t quite work for catching the positive OPK’s properly.  The clinic recommends next month I do follicle monitoring ultrasounds and use the hCG (human chorionic gonadotropin) Trigger Shot when the time is right. 

This does increase the possibility of twins I think. This is does make for me being a bit more nervous on this, but I think it is worth it.  The amount of stress I’ve had peeing on three sticks at a time to see which ones work for me, and to try and pinpoint my ovulation has been hair raising.  HCG doesn’t guarantee twins, nor does it guarantee pregnancy.  Just helps things be a bit more relaxed about the process I think. 

One thing is for sure, Deb will have to give me the shot (if I don’t get it at the clinic), as I will not be able to give myself the shot.  I’m too nervous about needles.  So next month is hopefully the first go at this, which is the next step to this long process of getting the TTC journey started. 

From what I have read though, it does mean I can’t take a home pregnancy test early because it will give false positives.  I will have to truly wait the two weeks, or until AF shows up.   

Does anyone have experience with hCG shots?  

#167 CD15 (01/18/13)

Well, I have peed on a lot of sticks.  Thursday morning the lines were lighter but still there; still a big NO from First Response.  I even started also peeing on Clear Blue.  They had a faint line yesterday but still not strong enough to call the clinic.  Today the lines were almost nonexistent, and spin (EWSM) is gone, however, I haven’t had a spike yet in temp.  I called the clinic and left a message and explained everything.  I’ll see what they say, but I’m sure we have missed our window. 

Now I’m border-line crying.  We have been waiting and waiting for so long and we thought this would be the month for first try.  Just to miss it, and have to wait again. 

With the emotions pouring, I now want comfort food; greasy, salty, sweet food; pizza, chocolate, cheesecake, brownies, caramel popcorn, cookies, everything.  It is going to take some serious will power to get through this one.  

PS:  I’m trying to keep in mind everything happens for a reason. 

#162 CD1 Came Early (01/03/13)

Well, I had this dream, my first cycle ovulation day would be on a weekend day.  Have acupuncture, have a relaxing insemination, go back for acupuncture, and have a relaxing day with my wife.  Poof, that dream is coming to a probable end.  AF came a few days early thus I will more than likely be ovulating on a regular week day, and thus have to try and fit these things into my schedule.  Maybe I can try and swing my work schedule to work on a weekend, to have my ovulation day off, or a half day. 

This does explain my extreme chocolate craving yesterday though.  I had figured it was way too early to be PMS cravings and just thought it was my diet enemy Amy coming forth.  Which I did cave in to and had some chocolate. 

Yesterday I had scheduled my appointments for acupuncture on January 19^th, which would have been a great day.  I even had to reschedule after looking at the Fertility Clinic’s times for weekend IUI’s and found they only do afternoon appointments on weekends.  Now I will more than likely need to reschedule again.  I think I will talk with my boss a little bit to see how they want to handle these appointments.    Alas, all the talk about starting this month and my body reacted “Ooohh it’s time to start here we go.”  Hopefully it is open and receptive and we have compatible healthy sperm and we get the one shot trial.  We’ll see how it goes. 

But the insanity of officially Trying To Conceive is beginning and it is CD1

#156 Surgery Follow Up (12/11/12)

My polyp removal was a success.  My uterus is in good shape.  My right fallopian tube is good and clear.  My left fallopian tube has a small polyp that he left alone.  The doctor showed me a picture, it looks like a little rubber nub.  It isn’t cause for concern, and once you start to play with the fallopian tubes, things can get fried (his word not mine) pretty easily, so he left it there.  This is a bit step forward.  We have clearance to go ahead on my next period.  Which would be now, but because I have one more tooth that should be fixed before pregnancy, it will be in January. 

The countdown is on.  Approximately 38 days to my first IUI.  We are hoping the stars align and we are one of the few that gets a home run on the first try.  Not holding my breath, but hoping.  I went through Deb and my plan for pregnancy with the doctor and he did caution I may want to try more than three times, I mentioned, I realize that, but for now, this is the plan.  Virgos, we need a plan of action first, winging it doesn’t work. 

OT – I’m slowly getting my groove back towards weight loss.  The show The Walking Dead is helping with that.  We’ve signed up for Netflix and now I mostly limit my Walking Dead watching to when I’m working out, thus motivating me to get on the treadmill.  Whatever works I guess.  We’ve also been pretty good about eating healthy too.  

#154 Polypectomy (11/19/12)

On Thursday I had the surgery to remove the polyp.  Barring almost getting sent for a mammogram, (Patient mix-up) everything went well.  While getting checked in, the nurse informed me that I needed to take a pregnancy test.  They failed to let me know beforehand, I had just peed, so I tried to say I didn’t need one.  I said “there was no way I was pregnant because I hadn’t had sex with a man in over 5 years.”  She then said “I’m Sorry.” As if to say I hadn’t been in a relationship for that long.  I then went on to explain that the person next to me was my WIFE, and this surgery was part of the journey in order to get pregnant.  She then went to her higher up person to ask, the answer was I still had to pee in a cup.  I told them they would have to wait until I had to pee again.  It wasn’t a huge surprise, my first BFN. At least it wasn’t the full TWW before that test. 

There were many stages to the day; mostly from one nursing station to the next.  Once I got escorted to the surgery ward we got to meet the anesthesiologist, the intern and talk with my surgeon.  I walked right into the operating theatre suite.  Once I was situated on the table, the surgeon went over what he was going to do to me; which was a good thing seeing the mammogram mix up almost happened, this gave me the extra piece of mind that he was doing the right surgery.  Shortly after that, I was out via IV sedation.  I do remember waking up during surgery and saying, “That is a bit painful”.  They must have given more sedation, as that was all I remember. 

Post surgery, the hand written note from my doctor was “The polyp was removed.  J”.  While in the one hour wait post waking up the nurse was talking about pain management.  She was saying I could take, to Advil, then in two hours I could take two Tylenol, then after the next two hours I could take Advil again, and repeat that rotation.  That was in fair shock, as I didn’t think there would be that much pain that required that much management.  All in all I took one Advil when I got home to help with the cramps, and that was it.  There was some discomfort, but I didn’t want to over medicate so I could monitor if things were getting better or worse.  The cramps followed for a couple days afterwards, minimally.  But at least the oven is clean to put a bun in it to start baking. 

I need to go for a follow up appointment in four weeks.  Then we will begin the wait for my first cycle that we will be able to inseminate, which looks like the end of January due to the clinic closure for Christmas. 

My wife pampered me all day and night.  It was a great “Sherpa” training day.  I came across that term reading the linked blog.  I liked it and so did Deb, so we have agreed to use that term Sherpa to the Non Bio Mom when one of us is pregnant.  I’m lucky to have such a wonderful wife. 

This is a picture of me being wheeled out to the car by my Sherpa. 

#151 Anesthesiologist Appointment (11/02/12)

Well, as part of my TTC journey, I had my anesthesiologist appointment yesterday.  When the nurse was making the appointment with me she warned me to bring water, snacks, and something to read, the appointments would take at least 2-3 hours.  Being I didn’t want to pay for outrageous hospital parking I had arranged to have my MIL to drop me off and pick me up when I was done.  I had also booked the afternoon off work.  My baggage carrying into this appointment was fairly large, I had a big bag of all my medications, and vitamins, with a bottle of water.  Then I had my large purse with a variety of snacks stuffed into it.  Then I had the big book “What to Expect When Your Expecting” by Heidi Murkoff, Sharon Mazel.  (On a side note, I have been told it is not a kind book to people who are overweight, so I’m trying to take any negativity with a grain of salt, and doing a slight skim read instead of reading word for word.  So far it has been worth the read.) and of course a travel coffee mug.  When a hospital says the appointment is going to be 2-3 hours I was ready for longer. 

The appointment was to consist of and EKG, nurse consult, anesthesiologist consult and chest x-ray.  The estimated time waiting was I think because you are forever waiting for the appointment to start on time, then the next person, move to next area and wait, and repeat. 

This is how the appointment ended up going.  Traffic was good, so I was about 15 minutes early.  When I went up to the admissions desk, they thought I was someone else, which had been late.  Because the earlier appointment was late or a no-show, and I was early they put me in that slot.  So I was escorted into the exam room right away by the nurse consultant.  I got my bags put down, and the EKG technician came in right away to do that first.  That was very quick, and unofficially looked good, yay.  The nurse stayed in the room, so once I was done the EKG I sat with her, went over my medications and medical history.  She also took my blood pressure, which was a little high, but we were talking about babies and TTC, so I chalk it up to that, but I think my blood pressure might be something to keep an eye on.  Not good.  Once the consultation was done with her she left the room saying the doctor would be in soon, which I took as I would be waiting for a while.  I read less than two pages in the book and the doctor came in.  We went over my anesthetic options for surgery; she asked a few health questions; then instructed me to go back to the front desk to get my x-ray form and go over to the emergency wing of the hospital to get to imaging diagnostics.  So I did just that. 

Once at the diagnostics area, I handed the form to the front desk, which she then instructed me to have a seat in the waiting room.  I was the only person there.  About a minute later I get called by the x-ray technician to get changed into a very fashionable hospital gown.  Once I was changed I went right in, had two x-rays, and left.  The whole series of events took a little less than 45 minutes.  The down side, I had to go back to work, the up side, I have no red flags for surgery in two weeks.  Yay.

#150 Body getting ready? (10/23/12)

Lately my body is experiencing psychosomatic symptoms of being pregnant; heart burn to the point of reflux, constipation, mood swings at odd points, yesterday I went from Happy, to irritable, to screaming at dropped pumpkin bags, to sad, to mellow in a matter of hours.  Is this my body’s way of saying “are you sure you want to do this for nine months?” or is my body wanting to get pregnant so bad it is trying to be ready? Or are there things in the supreme prenatal vitamins that do this to a person?  Or are the vitamins countering the synthroid I’m on? Was yesterday’s mood swing a delay on menstrual hormones? Or a combination of the above.  Pregnancy is going to be a roller coaster for me and my Sherpa (my wife who will be my helper while pregnant; inspired by 2 Moms – It Can Be Done.) Maybe it is my body’s way of preparing me for the dreaded/anticipated TWW, so I don’t stress over every symptom thinking “Am I pregnant?” because I’ve had these leading up to the first IUI, then I just need to wait Patiently for a BFP. 

On a side note, from my previous post, the friend in my previous post, was having her first when my wife and I were discussing what needed to happen before we started the TTC journey.  Now she is all ready on her second.  It's a little aggravating the hoops we, as lesbians, need to go through to even start trying.  I thought my wife was jumping the gun a little when she mentioned we should get the ball rolling earlier this year, but we did, and now we are all ready behind on our planned schedule starting because of my polyp.  I guess I’m feeling the frustration, aggravation, annoyance, and sadness with the process. 

#149 BFP... (10/22/12)

For a friend of mine.  She has been trying for one complete cycle, a little on the previous, but not consistent.  She is a fertile bunny.  On her first pregnancy, she had it timed to the day she would try her first pregnancy test (on father’s day) to get a possible BFP, months in advance.  She allowed timing to come off BC, then clear her system, wait the couple months, cycle and bam, pregnant.  She pretty much did the same this time again.  I hope I’m that fertile.  She has a slight advantage though; live sperm on demand.  That I suppose is one of the advantages to being straight. 

The other day I had a dream that my wife and I were trying to steal sperm, kind of like on The L Word where Bette and Tina try and get into a threesome.  Alas, any time in my dream I tried to kiss the man, it was like I was kissing poison, needless to say it was an epic fail, even in my dream, to get pregnant.  Let’s hope the clinical way works better in reality. 

#148 IUI Timing (10/18/12)

You have to remember, everything happens for a reason.  Everything happens for a reason.  Everything happens for a reason. 

When I first saw my fertility doctor, we had charted one month of BBT.  He said we don’t need to do that anymore, so we stopped.  I’m starting up again, just for my curiosity but haven’t gotten a full month.  I’ve just started my cycle again, 3 days early.  So I’m trying to have a full month charted, and continue going for now.  The point to this is; my cycle is now 3 days early.  This puts my ovulation days (per my iPFree App) right when the clinic is closed for Christmas break.  I can’t go before that, as I have surgery to remove a polyp scheduled for mid November, right when I’m menstruating, so that complete month is out.  Before this early cycle, my peak ovulation day was January 3^rd 2013, and that is the day the clinic reopens for business.  I was really hoping time would be on my side and I would be able to try first week into the New Year.  Now, I’m looking at the end of January, which would mean the earliest Due date would be November 1^st.  That is a little too late in the year to have my grandmother fly over from England. 

So, I’m now sending my body fertile thoughts and direction to have a shorter cycle this month as well, which would pull my prime date ovulation to before the clinic closes for Christmas.  I’m now also wondering if I should do a couple months of OPK’s to test that they do work for my body, and that I ovulate close to when the App thinks I do.  The OPK’s are just expensive and I’m wondering if it is worth the cost.  Did anyone test OPK’s before trying IUI? 

Quick cycle, quick cycle, quick cycle, breathe, relax, quick cycle, quick cycle.  Everything happens for a reason. 

I think my cycle starting early may be my body saying, hurry up and get pregnant all ready.  I hope so, but it isn’t quite working to the PLAN.  Goes to show plans can change at a moment’s notice. 

#132 My thoughts about getting Pregnant (09/20/12)

Well, today my wife was trying to get caught up with my blog.  She came across this post Pinnacle Pregnancy Point.  The main comment was about

Today is the day I find out if my body is ready for me to become a mom.  (My mind is still in debate.) 

She was worried I am not on board with the pregnancy any more.  That I had kind of gotten on the pregnancy train, and now I couldn’t get off.  That isn’t quite what I had meant. 

Am I worried about getting pregnant; yes.

Do I still want to get pregnant; yes. 

You can see the debate that happens in my head which prompted the sentence above.

One fear I have about becoming pregnant is gaining too much weight and ending up on bed rest because my body won’t support the extra weight.  That is the one fear that is above and beyond the usual pregnancy fears of miscarriage, diabetes, birth defects, not being able to get pregnant, toxaemia, Crohn’s flaring up, asthma getting worse, allergies getting worse (the last bunch, I’m hoping it follows other trend of getting better.) and the dreaded morning sickness.  My stomach used to be fairly iron clad, used to take a LOT to get me to puke; now I get queasy a lot quicker.  We have a few pregnancy books, which I’m sure will instill a few more fears, but I still want to do this.  

I will admit, reading the blogs that I have, has helped get over the initial fear of even trying, and seeing the end result as to why we do this. 

http://2-moms.blogspot.ca/

http://2momstobe.blogspot.ca/

Are two main ones I have read. 

The next fear is one, I hope most people share, “Will I be a good mom?”  My wife is sure I will be, and I’m positive she will be, but still worried I won’t be.  Not having maternal instincts kick in, not trusting what to do.  But the end argument is “you won’t know until you try.”

#131 Sperm Relief (09/17/12)

As mentioned before in #126, our sperm donor is no longer in the system.  I was getting very stressed over having enough chances to have two pregnancies.  Originally my wife and I said, we would try three times each to get pregnant, otherwise, we would adopt, thus in the end would need 6 vials from the same donor.  We didn’t purchase all at the same time, and should have. 

Today, I got an email from our sperm bank, leading me to believe we could buy more, but do it soon.  I thought there was some mass confusion on this, so I emailed back to double check. They responded there are the last 3 vials available; please respond soon as there are other clients interested in them.  I emailed and texted my wife urgent to call me to double check with her.  I have just placed the order to have the remaining three we wanted/needed.  That is a huge perfect birthday present for me.  I am just tearing up waiting for the response that the vials will be ours. 

There is always a chance that I won’t get pregnant in three tries, or my wife won’t get pregnant in three tries or we both could get pregnant on the first try and have extra, but then we are covered for more kids if needed.  Our original plan was to each try three goes and go from there.  We should have just stuck to that and purchased the 6 right off the bat.  But at least now, we have the “supplies” to follow our original plan. 

I guess now I need to book the acupuncture and massages to give things every chance they have. 

I just got the email from the bank.  The order has been placed and the sperm will be in transit to Canada.  They will hold at their location until we order a transfer to Calgary.  Woohoo.  My nerves are still a little bit on edge, until they get here and we have paid for them, but this has helped tremendously. 

#128 Timeline of IUI (09/11/12)

Well, it has been a fairly long journey to get to this point, and it is going to be a bit longer.  The trip started pretty much at the beginning of this year when my wife tried to quit smoking.  That took a few months, then testing for Rubella, and getting on the wait list for the fertility clinic.   It was about five months ago that we got the phone call about when we might get our first appointment.  After testing, purchasing sperm and more testing we now have a new timeline. 

The surgery to remove the polyp in my uterus is scheduled for mid November.  That is another two months away, then another cycle after that for our first attempt.  Late November would be my first ovulation after the surgery.  That is too early in my opinion, no healing time.  However the next ovulation would be over the Christmas/New Year period, which after reading a few other blogs, I’m not convinced our clinic will be open those days.  I’ve emailed the clinic to check. 

On the upside, that gives me more time to lose weight, on the downside, that is lessening the possibility of my Grandma flying over for the birth, even now that is a remote possibility.  My boss is happy of the delayed timeframe.  She is in slight denial that I would be leaving for maternity leave.    

As my other posts before this one, New Month, New Vigor or New Month, New Motivation, I need to kick up my weight loss again.  I don’t think I’m the only one that goes through this cycle of three steps forward and two steps backwards, or should I say three pounds lost, and two pounds gained.  As long as it doesn’t turn into two pounds lost and three gained, repeatedly it is still technically progress. 

So now I need to get rid of the cruise pounds, and continue on my weight loss lifestyle.  Going from full buffet for a week to normal is a hard transition.  I just had three cookies with Tea Tuesday.  Not a good diet choice.  Our vegetables haven’t been cut yet for our lunch salads either; Sunday had very good reasons, Monday medium good reason.  But tonight it is the night they have to get done.  I think my body is craving the veggies again. 

My current goal is to work out on Tuesdays and Thursdays, NO EXCUSES.  The closer I get to possible pregnancy the more worried I am that I will be put on bed rest because my body can’t support the weight of baby and pregnancy gain.  Well, today is Tuesday, and I have a million other things that need to be done, but I NEED to put working out in the top three. 

On the fertility goals, I have also put an email into our friend who is a Fertility Acupuncturist, who owns a clinic that focuses on Fertility, which also has massage, and chiropractic, along with a few other services. Currently I have three extended medical plans which has coverage for such things, and two of which have amounts that expire at the end of the year, thus, I might as well use them up.  So I am trying to be one relaxed cookie by the time I go for the first IUI treatment.  If only the plans also covered Manis/Pettis, that would be the ultimate relaxation day. 

#126 Catch Up (09/10/12)

Well, it has been over a week since my last post.  First major concern, last Friday, I found out, or donor for sperm is no longer in the system, and may not have sperm available for second pregnancies.  We are now having regrets not purchasing the full six at the time of purchase.  Alas, all things happen for a reason.  We will see how things go.  But it was a shock to our planning.  We are soon going to blitz through the sperm banks again and look for CMV positive donors as well, as a possible to save the current purchased items for my wife who needs CMV negative.  There are multiple options, but while we have the subscriptions for full profiles, we might as well use it. 

For the past week my wife, my MIL and I have been on vacation.  We went on a Cruise to Alaska.  It was a fantastic experience.  I had been worried about sea sickness, as I’m very prone to motion sickness in general, and while in Mexico, on various excursions on boats, experienced it to a varying degree.  Alas, I had my herbal Gravol in my pocket and took it when needed and was good to go.  I’ll post a few more pictures in a few days, with a bit more detail of our trip.  But here is one of a bear crossing our pathway while at a park in Juneau, and a rainbow we saw while on our boat.

The cruise was a floating buffet, so it was hard not be eat a lot.  It was diet killing, but worth it, I think.  In the end, I gained about 6 pounds, hopefully I can burn then off quickly.  Not holding my breath though, but will be working on it diligently. 

It seems Sunday was a day of days.  We got off to a slow start to have a morning to relax, watch some TV and started laundry.  While we were going through flyers to make up our shopping list we got a call from my FIL.  My MIL had slipped in a grocery store and was being attended by EMS and would be taken to the hospital, he just didn’t know which one yet.  Thankfully nothing got broken, but did end up with a lot of pulled ligaments in the back/inside of her legs. 

In the evening, while I was trying to take out the food processor to cut celery and cucumber for lunches, I sliced my thumb pretty good.  I yelled out ouch, and my wife yelled if I was ok, from upstairs, and I said “Not really.”  I had managed to get to the sink before blood started flowing quickly, but couldn’t get anything to put over it to stop the bleeding.  She rushed in and handed me some paper towel to be able to get me to the first aid station in our house upstairs.  We were on the debate on stitches or not, but once my thumb was above my heart for a while it stopped bleeding, one trip to emergency in a family per day is plenty.  So she put on a make shift butterfly bandage and taped/splinted me up so I couldn’t move my thumb and bust open again.  By this time it was after 10:00 pm and we still hadn’t had dinner, my MIL didn’t want the casserole I had made, she only wanted mushroom soup, so we made her some, then dished out the casserole for the three of us and took the plates/bowls to their house. 

While we were there, MIL finally reached the point where she needed some pain killers.  She hates taking anything, even for a headache.  So my wife went to our house to get something for her.  While there she let out the dogs for a quick run outside.  When she went to let them in something happened.  And this part is a good chuckle, only because he is ok.  My dog Tuffy was running full board into the house, but he missed the first step by a hair and ran straight into the slate riser.  It resulted in a temporary TKO (Total Knock Out).  My wife said Eep, and while she was wondering what to do, he regained consciousness.  He was a little wobbly for a bit, but seemed fine otherwise.  The story reminds me of a Tom and Jerry cartoon, so I have to chuckle. 

Now we are finally back on track, ready to work off the cruise pounds and process crab apple trees, browse sperm, and follow up when my Polyp surgery is.  Never a moment to say, what should we do today, there is always a long list of things to keep us busy. 

#124 Polyp Results (08/28/12)

Well, yesterday was very stressful for me.  After all was said and done, nothing different from what I had suspected.  I really need to keep my stressing in check.  Last night, after the muscle relaxants wore off, my stomach was not happy at all, that is the first place stress shows for me. 

Well back to the appointment in general.  It was supposed to be a quick appointment.  But, it wasn’t.  First off they did the follicle count again.  This time I got to see things, as they had a monitor on the wall for me to watch.  Today, I had 5 on my left, and 9 on my right for a total of 14 (last time I had 15). Even though one less, I’m still above normal, so good to go on that front. 

The SHG was a little different from what I had thought.  I thought the ultrasound was put into the uterus, but the catheter is just to add fluid so they can see the uterus better with the tranvaginal ultrasound; same wand that is used for the follicle count.  They once again saw the probably polyp.  Once they were finished looking, my doctor told me to go over to his office across the building and tell the receptionist that he wanted to see me.  I told him I had to pay for additional parking.  My appointment was supposed to be 10-15 maybe 20 minutes.  I was all ready at an hour between waiting, change into gown, waiting, test one, waiting, test two. 

Once more parking was paid for I went to my doctor’s office.  He explained what he saw, they polyp looked to be 8 mm in its highest diameter, with an average of 5mm.  He said it isn’t too big.  Now normally his patients, are people having issues with fertility, in which, a polyp might be a hindrance.  But the only reason he is our doctor, is the fact we are missing the crucial item, sperm.  Many people have polyps and get pregnant, and have no issues and deliver a perfectly healthy baby.  However people with polyps do have a higher rate of miscarriages. 

He then went on to tell me the surgery procedure, a little scary, and what the possible complications or issues could be, although small rates of issues.  The way he explained things, it was very detailed, but also very understandable, so that was nice, and I felt I had all the information to make a good decision.  He then asked if I wanted to have the surgery.  I told him I would follow his recommendation.  The doctor then asked me “If I weren’t to give you a recommendation, what would you like to do?” and I said “Have it removed.”  He had mentioned what I had been thinking, every time we tried to get pregnant (at a hefty cost each time), and didn’t succeed, I would be thinking, is the polyp the cause? 

End result, I should be getting a phone call in the next couple days to schedule surgery. 

#123 Pinnacle Pregnancy Point (08/27/12)

Today is my SHG to determine if the polyp is a polyp, and whether it needs to be evacuated from my uterus. 

Today is the day we find out if we are good to go as planned, or if there is going to be another delay. 

Today is the day that I get another invasive ultrasound.

Today is the day I find out if my body is ready for me to become a mom.  (My mind is still in debate.) 

Today my head is going in circles.  I’m trying to calm myself down, and say that today is no different than yesterday, but it’s not.

In two hours my wife and I will know if we are closer to becoming moms. 

#119 Too Much (08/21/12)

Do you ever feel like there is just too much going on?  Like you are juggling and you start with one ball, then add another, and anther.  Three balls not too bad, but then more keep coming, you keep adding to the circle of balls you are juggling until you feel if anything else comes at you everything will come crashing down. 

Crohn’s is somewhat new to my life.  My mom lived with it from her 20’s and in the end died from a spinoff of the disease.  It is funny though, it never seemed to be a topic of discussion in our house growing up.  I knew she didn’t eat green vegetables as they hurt her stomach, and a few other things here and there.  She occasionally had to have Boost meal drinks on top of her meals to help boost her calories.  Over the years she had multiple surgeries to remove pieces of her intestine.  I’m pretty sure she was on prentizone to help manage the crohn’s.  Even though I lived with someone majorly affected by crohn’s all of my juvenile life, I don’t know much about the disease, probably more than the general population, but not much.  Now that I have it, (one juggle), my Virgo self needs to research it (two juggle). 

In the attempt to lose weight (three juggle) in order to get pregnant (four juggle) my wife and I are eating healthy, which is helping for the diet requirement for Crohn’s which was suggested, basically eat from the Canada Food Guide, and minimize animal fats. Originally I didn’t think that was much of an issue, but my wife brought up the question “Does that include dairy and eggs?”  In our house that is a major source of protein. Thus we may have possible major changes in diet (five juggle), but at the very lease tracking my diet through My Fitness Pal back to a higher degree of accuracy to get a better view of my macros, including the vitamins I take to make sure I’m getting the nutrients I need, especially for when I’m pregnant.

Also along the trying to get pregnant list, the polyp is the next issue (six juggle). Not a major thing (hopefully), but still something bugging my noodle. 

Then we have the general living category, learning to can fruit and deal with a mass harvest (seven juggle).  My job, thankfully isn’t that stressful, but does occupy a fair amount of my day (eight juggle), preparing the house for before I get pregnant (pre nesting), like personalizing the master bedroom (nine) organizing our storage (ten), clearing out non essentials to make room for baby stuff (eleven), preparing for the cruise (twelve).  That is a dozen things up in the air right now, some more stressful than others; the last one a good one, but we’ve never been on a cruise so I don’t know what to prep for. This is all stuff that is either a have to deal with or really want to deal with but I’m feeling very overwhelmed.  I just feel I could sleep for a week to let things settle in my head then have a game plan.  But for the most part, everything is happening as it happens.  As long as the dozen juggles doesn’t turn into a baker’s dozen before the cruise, I think the cruise will give me the much needed rest from the regular day to day to come back with Vim and Vigor to attack the next thing that needs to be dealt with.

#117 Crohns Diagnosis (08/20/12)

Well, today was the day.  I went for my follow up with the gastrologist regarding crohns.  This was part of my “So close, yet so far” post.   The good news is this shouldn’t affect my pregnancy.  The bad news is I have been diagnosed with Crohns.  Because of family history the minor issues have been treated seriously and testing was put through instead of put off.  It is because of the cautiousness of my doctor, it has been caught very early.  Right now there is just a small section of my small intestine that is slightly inflamed, and my blood levels are just a bit out of the normal. 

This news was a big of a blow, but not quite unexpected.  Today I will be picking up my first prescription of the first level medications for treatment/maintenance of crohns.  This medication, or a variation there of, I will probably be on for the rest of my life (or until possible cure in the future, but that is currently in dream stage).  The first level medications are a Class B, which is relatively safe to take during pregnancy.  This will hopefully reduce the inflammation, and keep my stomach in line for a long time, including in pregnancy.  The possible scary thing is, for people that get pregnant, one in three that have stomach issues will get worse during pregnancy or afterwards, if not in control of the issue in advance.  My doctor didn’t seem too concerned though because it has been caught early and isn’t doing any over and above damage, currently.  In this case, the sooner I get pregnant the better, before the disease has a chance to get worse (hopefully, if, not when). 

So, the next possible road block I need to handle before trying to get pregnant is the polyp.  Today is my day 1 of my cycle, which is right on schedule, so I will be having my SHG in the next 6-10 days to see what, if anything, needs to be done.